Let’s eliminate a misconception first. Just because you have small hands doesn’t necessarily mean a small gun would be good for you.
The smaller the gun, the more the recoil. Also, the lighter the gun, the more the recoil. Because of physics, the frame of the gun is the first to absorb the “kick”, and a bigger, heavier gun will absorb more and leave less for your wrist.
The best option is to come into a gun store and let someone measure your hand against the gun your are thinking about purchasing.
The general rule is that the center of the web of skin between your thumb and index finger should be centered on the back of the grip. If you are correctly centered, you should be able to freely rotate your thumb into a “hitch-hiker” or “thumbs-up” position.
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Now, with the rest of your fingers curled around the grip and your index finger out straight…can you comfortably reach and press the trigger while keeping the web of your hand correctly centered on the back of the gun? If not… then that gun might be too large for you to comfortably shoot.
In our experience, some good semi-auto pistols for small hands (with a good size-to-recoil-absorption ratio) include: The Sig Sauer p365XL, the Sig Sauer P320 X-Compact, the H&K VP9, the Glock 48, and the Smith & Wesson Shield Plus.